29052010
SUNDAY
14:10
EXPO SUBWAY
NEW STUFF.
one week more of damned torture.
then i'm free.
CHERYL THE NAMES OF THESE NOTEPADS ARE RANDOM. bugger is not dumb one hor ^^
hmm, emilynn is flying monday midnight, anyone wants to hang at Changi Airport till 10pm? i need the company, or i'll just find a quiet corner and sleep.
cell's changing again, okay i guess. chuan's leaving, BOO. hehehh this afternoon didnt know what to say, sorry :) i will miss you one...
oh oh, new girls. we're combining again. dunno wwhat to make of it. but i'm thinking it will be good.
ICE CREAMM TMR :D i wanna go. then go shopping. ^^ see mom how first, should can one lahhh. but cant promise hor.
tired out, but hey hey, SHARON'S BACK.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
28052010
FRIDAY
STREET 81
12:27
STUPIDITY.
I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in
'Cause I got time while she got freedom
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven
Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no
What am I suppose to do
When the best part of me was always you and
What am I suppose to say
When I'm all choked up and you're okay
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces
They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven, even, no
What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I suppose to say
When I'm all choked up and you're okay
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces
(One's still in love while the other one's leaving)
I'm falling to pieces
('Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven)
You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain
You took your suitcase, I took the blame
Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, oh
'Cause you left me with no love and no love to my name
I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in
'Cause I got time while she got freedom
'Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't break
No it don't break, no it don't breakeven, no
What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I supposed to say
When I'm all choked up and you're okay
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces
(One's still in love while the other one's leaving)
I'm falling to pieces
('Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't breakeven)
Oh, it don't breakeven, no
Oh, it don't breakeven, no
Oh, it don't breakeven, no
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
26052010
WEDNESDAY
19:35
STREET 81
DULL ACHE.
June six is hengkang's birthday. it marks one year since he's been gone, and I've just been letting it eat at me.
he misses this place terribly, but he knows it is not for him to decide when he can come back.
i kept thinking at first, what kind of dad would do that to his only son, to just send him away.
then i realised that's how he got to Singapore in the first place.
but i know that no foreign father would like to see his son serve NS while he could be studying somewhere prestigious. I'm just glad hengkang doesn't blame him any more.
never mind me, I've just been thinking too much.
a reply to Xiaoyee's comment in the sidebar -
yes it still bugs me, because that one trip did open the world suddenly for me. in Thailand, i saw all the sights someone as young as me couldn't have at such a young age, but i gave up something i trained for ten months to get it. it wasn't easy to say yes to the trip, but i know the experience i have gained is more precious than the regret i feel sometimes. it was my choice in the end,and i wouldn't have wished so differently, even a second time round.
it just feels good to get something off my chest, after so long.
another totally different thing.
I saw Daryl today.
i know we're over, and i have no right to interfere in his business.
but i also know he has cleaned up his act, he has become more wiser.
i fight to tell myself that everything can wait, until i finish school. if he is right, God will send him again.
i fought real hard, and I'm tired.
maybe it's just as well that mom wants to move, and the move will help keep things off our minds.
i dont think i'll put a picture today.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
21052010
FRIDAY
15:20
STREET 81
REALISTIC.
if you one chance in life, its very hard to get another one like it.
i used to think if i had not gone on the Thailand diving trip,
if i had gone to the National Library @Bugis to perform with all the rest of the musical crew. if i had been more firm in my response to all the nagging and more decisive to my own mind.
i might never have gotten to be such a good diver, and i might never get the full expenses paid trip ever again.
but i would have a very fulfilling musical track record.
"if" is the one word in the English vocabulary that has dethroned kings and killed presidents.
so much power is attributed to the smallest things of the world, just to shame the wise, because no matter how wise, you cant answer all the "if"s in the world.
maybe to a more concrete question, one about the present perhaps. i could ask you what you wanted to do with your life, or what you wished for to happen in the near future. but that is not important.
what is important, is where your heart is. a simple enough question, you shouldn't have to think about it at all. answer the first instinct you think up. if you cant answer, you have probably lost it.
if you have lost it, go get it back. it cant come back on its own, because it needs a place in mind and guidance from your feelings. if you lose it forever, i can guarantee you that you will be the most miserable person you'll ever meet, no doubt about it.
oh, and you probably be the most regretful person you have ever met too.
that will be kind of sad, to be the most alone person, without a person to share that misery or replace it with love.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
18052010
TUESDAY
20:12
STREET 81
SHOUT OUTS.
okay, people, someone suggested i take shout-outs from you guys.
i've got 10 i want to do, if youwant one you can tag my blog or give me an almighty sms. i'll just keep editing the post till 2359. :) give me the name you want with what you want to say or i'll say something for you. :D
MEESIAM
thanks for all the old advice in the side bar :)
EM
shoo. :D
YONG
hello all you people, talking nonsense here. exams over, yay! who else is happy? everyone right? okay, bye bye. ;P
MOM
have you done your homework? what, no homework? okay make sure you sleep early, and say hi from me to all your friends.
MINYI
thanks buddy, cheer up.
BARNEY
LOL at your marks, haha, of course i havent told your sis. i'm waiting for you to tell her. :p it's more entertaining that way.
Labels: NOTES.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
13052010
THURSDAY
19:44
STREET 81
SHUT UP.
they say if you have nothing good to say, dont say it.
i beg to differ. if you dont share the bad, how do you learn?
maybe some people just cant take crtisism. too bad.
ok maybe this should be classified as short notes, because this is only half the normal length.
but i'm still putting the pretty picture :D
i think i'm going swimming, or library for fun.
oh ya. another thing.
is it true that i talk to ivan alot? maybe its because we have alot to talk about, nothing different okay.
i think that's all.
Labels: NOTES.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
10052010
MONDAY
10:34
BUS 31
STUCK ON YOU
listening to yellow on the bus, on the way home. supposed to be home by 11, but mom isn't home and i'm taking my own time.
probably going to courts to get a memory card for that bloody camera of mine. decided to do away with the wire cause the card is portable and easier to use. so i can finally load the pictures of my baby while she's still home.
changi village sounds awesome, as long as time isnt the factor. i should cycle and get these lazy bones of mine moving. wondering whether i'm rusting just as fast as my bike. dayizhang reckons i need to repaint it already, and use cloth and paint brushes this time. maybe i'll do it during the june holidays.
exams weren't so bad during the week, and i found some of them relatively easy, minus the time factor. minyi says she has enough time cause she left too many questions blank. i just thank God for wisdom and understanding. it's all my creator and no crappy tuition.
Bless him. that's just one of the real life benefits of having a living God, he understands real world physics :D
of course he understands the world he created. which reminds me, to find my purpose i need to go back to the inventor and the instruction manual.
BIBLE and JESUS. two full proof study methods i swear by.
and that's good grades for you :)
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
08052010
SATURDAY
14:54
STREET 81
YELLOW.
Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know; maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop.
Grey's Anatomy
mother's day tommorow.
mom keeps all the little little things i've given her all these years: cards, dried flowers, teddy bears, handmade jewellery.
i once made her a tiramisu cake, the way xiao yee taught me. she ate the cake for breakfast the whole week, cream cheese and all.
it wasnt what she liked exactly, but she finished it.
after that i did many more for my friends and leaders, but she only ate tiramisu once more, during emilyn's birthday.
i stopped for a year, and i couldnt find any of those lady fingers this year.
maybe i should just make her a shirt or a bag, something that she will use and not banish to the collection.
hmmmm.
well, i'll go back and think about it somemore.
oh by the way, the song in the muzicon is Yellow by Coldplay.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
06052010
THURSDAY
21:09
STREET 81
SHOOTING STARS.
shooting stars are the result of space debris burning up in the earth's atmosphere as they fell. the scientists will test you they are probably rubbish that got accidently attracted by the moon's then the earth's gravity, ending in combustion during free-fall.
mendival times put shooting stars as bad omen or manisfestations of the devil's prevailence on earth. they liken a sighting to the death of a king, and a shower of them brought clamity such as drought and famine.
the chinese and persians will tell you that they bring you great wealth and blessing. the little moving lights were symbols of good deeds falling from the sky, or a divine announcement of a miracle.
the new age brought new meaning to the shooting stars. they became symbols of love, commitment and closely linked to new beginnings or hope. more common would be the belief that wishing upon on would grant you your desire. people clasp hands and will their aspirations onto what science calls litter.
shootings stars are few and far between. we count on them to help us because we believe.
if that believe were used in God? imagine the things you can do for him, when you pin all those goals and hope on something that actually works beyond imagination. shooting stars dont always work, but God will.
that i can tell you, all those scientists, mendival experts, the Ancient Chinese and Persians, and so much more of us in the new age will agree on. Not shooting stars, but God.
believe in what works today.
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
03052010
MONDAY
10:37
STREET 81
SEA BREEZE.
okay, Labour Day School holiday today for the teachers! the government is thoughtful, but i'll rather finish my exams one day early than have a holiday.
been revising like crazy, but i promise i'll still updatethis blog.
let's just say that it's too precious to die.
so hopefully once every two weeks counts as still alive. i'll keep little snippets too, buut without the full format and the pictures that come with the full posts. the music will change a little more often, depending on the frequency of more amazing music discoveries.
but my marks are going to see the moon, i assure you.
*NOTE:
song in the sidebar is Fix YoU Coldplay. erm, special thanks to mr Yazeed for the music video recomendation. been listening to it and i think it's a great song with an encouraging meaning to the verses. thumbs up!
♥ I'VE GOT HEAVEN ON THE INSIDE OF ME.
peace and joy God has set me free.
peace and joy God has set me free.
